Michael Jordan can’t prevent forest fires
Published by The Cavalier August 12th, 2005 in Legends, Michael Jordan
Fire officials in Santa Barbara, CA want to speak with Michael Jordan regarding a forest fire he may know something about. They aren’t saying he set it yet, only that people in his golfing party may have been involved.
We know a couple things about the world and one is that you don’t try to blame forest fires, earthquakes, or tornadoes on MJ. The only possible result is that you fail, and then nobody likes you anymore. There’s an outside shot you could make a fortune with your tell-all book “Flare Jordan: How I Lost My Family, My Job, and My Reputation Trying to Blame a Forest Fire on Michael Jordan”, but again, you have no friends, so what’s the point, really?
What’s surprising to us is that Michael didn’t simply extinguish this fire when he became aware of it. We’ve always felt he could do anything. In fact, if there was an ad for a pay-per-view special advertising that Michael Jordan was going to eat the internet, we would immediately order, fully expecting to see it happen.
jonny