YAYsports! NBA

We don’t think we even made note of it at the time, but T-Wolves PF/C Eddie Griffin was picked up for DUI back in March.

Technically it wasn’t a DUI, as the officers apparently drove him home without any messy “legal complications” like blood tests or the like.

This didn’t sit well with the driver of the car he hit, and now said driver is suing Eddie in civil court. The witness accounts of Eddie’s behavior after the accident is quite simply awesome.

Abed Hassuneh, who is the brother of the victim, said Griffin told him, “That he was masturbating himself going down that street. That’s how the accident happened because he was not paying attention. He’s paying attention to that video and all of a sudden he’s shoveled somebody’s car on the top of the sidewalk.”

You can watch more of the surveillance video here. Our favorite part is either when Griffin offers to buy the guy whatever car he wants “tomorrow” if he’ll not blame it all on him or when the above quote is said by the guy’s bro.

Something about the way he makes it all sound so matter-of-fact is pretty special. We imagine being in that situation, and there’s not much to stop us from laughing while explaining our account.

What’s Griffin thinking anyway? We can see maybe pulling the “Yeah I was drunk - look, I’ll hook you up wth a new car tomorrow, okay?” However, the “Yeah I was drunk and masturbating [while driving] - look, I’ll hook you up with a new car tomorrow, okay?” is a stretch.

BTW, Basketball Boobs is an actual porno - Google leads you to the funniest things. Our workload was cut tremendously thanks to the miracle search engine.

(NOTE: KG - still thrilled to be a T-Pup. Thanks to TrueHoop.)