Pat Riley is coaching the Heat

It was somewhat inevitable, but Pat Riley has officially made official his official intention to officially coach the defending champion Miami Heat for 2006-07.

We expect about 49 wins from the Heat – that’ll be the result of post-championship malaise, Shaq malaise, and general malaise. They’ll turn it on for the Playoffs, and they’ll be in there in the Conference Finals somewhere (against CLE).

We’d slap up the Riley statement, but it’s super-generica in nature, and you’ve likely read it a bunch of places already, anyway. Instead, let’s go straight to Celticsblog, and see how they’re feeling.

I’m bored with just about every topic there is to write about right now, so I’m probably going to take some time to work on behind the scenes stuff here at the blog. In the meantime, please feel free to continue participating in the blog forums and I’ll try to kick up the occasional topic on the front page.

C’mon, Jeff…you can’t just throw it in like that.

You’ve gotta make up some stuff about some kind of horrible tragedy in your life, or maybe some kind of mission you went on to save orphans from something terrible, like being orphaned.

As far as Riles goes, we admire the fact that he’s refused to admit to a hair transplant and hair transplants, which implies there was a phase one or several phases to the transplant process. If you’re wondering why that sentence was so awkward, it’s because we once again banged ourself out to shill for plastic surgeons.

For some reason someone like the enigmatic and talented Dr. Pistone thinks you people need to go under the knife and get all beautiful. We’re going to assume many of you don’t need to, but if you do, Dr. Pistone isn’t a bad choice, mainly because he’s the top plastic surgeon in all of Philadelphia.

Also, allow us to take a moment to address yesterday’s accusation that this blog has seen its prime time pass on by.

ABSOLUTELY it has! And yet, a snake named Mamba shall save us all. (We swear to Zeus this thing will come out by the time preseason starts. We promise.)