Pau Gasol is on the block

If you can drag yourself away from DetroitBadBoys’ “most comprehensive ever” Carnival of the NBA for a moment, we’d like to direct your attention to something we mentioned briefly in a previous post.

This seemed to have been bubbling and/or rumored for awhile, but now it’s more or less official – Memphis All-Star power forward Pau Gasol and his electric are on the trading block.

Griz head man Jerry West is adamant about not having a fire-sale type of deal, but based on Pau’s frankness about wanting to leave and West’s statement that the team is listening to offers, we’d say IT IS ON.

“The conversation [with the Bulls] was brief,” West said. “But we’re not giving him away. This franchise won’t give him away. Period.”

“If we trade Pau we’re looking to substantially improve the team for the future or we would be looking to get more picks in this draft,” [team owner something something] Heisley said. “If we can improve the team, we would trade Pau. But there’s a difference when you’ve made up your mind like with Jason Williams and Bonzi Wells. Pau Gasol is not available in that sense. I don’t make trades. But if Jerry came to me with a trade that would improve this team, Pau will be traded. Jerry is always exploring possibilities.”

We’re not sure why the owner is even worried about this stuf, since he’s been trying to sell the team for some time now, but whatever. Let’s do the Sam Smith and fire up the ESPN Trade Checker…and let’s do it now.

CLE TRADES:
Anderson Varejao
Shannon Brown
Sasha Pavlovic

MEM TRADES:
Electric Pau!

As you saw if you followed the link, this trade doesn’t work. In fact, based on our brain functions, there’s no way in hell the Cavs are getting Pau Gasol unless MEM will take Drew Gooden (who they already had a go-round with), Z (who’s like a downgraded Pau who’s older), or Larry Hughes (who they have no use for and we kinda need).

Even so, we’re going to continue to make up fake trades that include contracts like Eric Snow, Ira Newble, and David Wesley until Pau packs his bags and heads to…here’s our call…New Jersey.

No, we don’t know how that’ll happen. Maybe via recent surgical volunteer Richard Jefferson? Do they have gay bars fun clubs in Memphis?