Darko Milicic has the angries

As we mentioned lasterday, the ORL signing of Rashard Lewis means that infamously bustable PF/C Darko Milicic has become an unrestricted free agent.

While we assumed the Lakers fans were going to be all up on him, it seems that it’s actually fans of the Cavaliers who want a piece of Darko. Even Brian Windhorst comments that this is a possibility, especially with Anderson Varajeo rumored to have a big, overpriced deal on the table from another team.

Additionally, CLE SG Sasha Pavlovic is Serbian (like Darko) and they share an agent.

Said agent isn’t happy with the way things went with the Magic in the past week, which mean El Darko is definitely on the move elsewhere.

“There’s no chance [Darko plays for the Magic]. Put it in big capital letters.” Cornstein[-Man] called [Magic GM Otis] Smith a “liar” and said his dealings with Milicic were “deceitful, disrespectful . . . a disgrace.”

“If Otis had been a decent human being and said that Rashard Lewis is the player we want the most, even if we have to sacrifice Darko, my reaction would not have been happiness. But I would have said, ‘I appreciate you telling me,’ ” Cornstein said. “Instead, the guy told us Darko was a priority, and he lied. . . . All stuff that goes around, comes around.”

Cornstein-Man also noted that he was informed of all of this via e-mail, which he found horrifying, because he has an iPhone, and really likes when people call him on it.

This way when he’s like at the mall or wherever, he can take it out and be all, “Ooh, what could that be? Oh look, it seems my iPhone is ringing. Well, let me just take it out and talk on it loudly in public, so that everyone knows I have an iPhone!” (As you can imagine, we’ve encountered just a few of these types here in LA.)

Regardless, let’s get back to this Darko-in-CLE business. First of all, the Varajeo contract rumor is bogus – when was the last time a free agent was offered a big contract and it wasn’t reported? (”Never” is the answer you’re looking for.) And why wouldn’t they agree to it immediately? Even if he wants to stay in Cleveland, the Cavs have the option to match.

Secondly, Darko is Cleveland is something we could be convinced to get into within an estimated five days of it being official. Despite rumors of laziness, non-motivation, and four years of uninspiring play, he young, tall, and can at the very least block shots. Knock that estimation down to four days.

Okay, three.

No, by 6pm we’ll be totally into this. Darko is the next…no. Darko is the first Darko. We can’t believe the Cavs might chase the greatest big man of his generation. This is amazing!