Coach Mike is extended

by The Cavalier on January 14, 2008 · 42 comments

Chris Bosh

Well, the Cavaliers went ahead and extended Coach Mike for two years, which by our math, saves us about $300 in “we’re not getting League Pass again until the Cavaliers get a new coach” fees.

We don’t need to go in-depth on this, do we?

In other Cavs news, LeBron got away with drunk driving at 100mph.

Not to jump to conclusions, but c’mon.

LeBron James was ticketed by the State Highway Patrol for reportedly driving 101 mph on Interstate 71 near Medina. The Cavaliers star was cited in a 65 mph zone at 2:43 a.m. on Dec. 30 – his 23rd birthday.

Cleveland attorney Colin Jennings filed a not guilty plea for James on Tuesday in Medina Municipal Court. Other details about the traffic stop were not available.

Where to begin?

23rd birthday, 2:30am, “other details not available”. Also, this was neatly buried and unreported for two weeks.

Read into it what you will – the real hilarity is that they entered a “not guilty” plea.

And not to be completely Mr. Conspiracy Theory, but is it a conflict of interest if ESPN owns a big chunk of NBA China?

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1 Fios January 14, 2008 at 1:00 pm

Stupid move … also, saw this in a Windhorst piece:

Pavlovic also has been trying to stay after practice to get extra shooting in.

TRYING to stay? How hard can it possibly be for him to actually stay?

2 Boney January 14, 2008 at 2:00 pm

perhaps he wasn’t drunk, just impaired.

On a side note:

I went out Friday evening for happy hour with a lady friend of mine, and in typical “Boney” fashion I ordered a shot of Patron to get the night started off right. Then when it was time to leave, I ordered one more shot of Patron to close it out. When I got my tab, I noticed that some jackass had charged a jack and diet and 1 extra brown ale on my tab. I know I had 6 beers, and 2 shots… so let me ask you what I consider to be my moral dilemma…

Only 4 beers were charged to my tab, but I know one of them wasn’t mine because happy hour ends at 6, and there was a beer on the tab at happy hour rates even though we didn’t get there until after happy hour hours. I know that my fine italian female friend picked up 3 of my beers (because they were on her tab). Long story short… do I pitch a fit because of the extra drinks or do I just pay? In all honesty, I ended paying about what I expected to pay for my drinks so picking it up was no big deal…

Also, a shot of patron at this bar was $11. By far the most expensive shot of patron I’ve ever purchased. The dive last week where I got tanked charged me $11.25 for a shot and a yueng ling…

Broke and lonely in Virginia

3 roger January 14, 2008 at 3:50 pm

I got no problem with Coach Mike. And really, this move doesn’t mean much other than giving him leverage for when Ira doesn’t want to check into a game because . . . . who knows – he’s solving Darfur at the time.

Isn’t this what LeBron’s 4 horsemen guys are for? Sheesh.

4 roger January 14, 2008 at 4:00 pm

Boney – the proper response is to wake up the next morning and go, “How did I spend 128 dollars last night?”

5 Jordi January 14, 2008 at 4:05 pm

Despite his attempt to flee, there will no escape for LeBron. He has to suffer through the Coach Mike era with everyone else.

6 Boney January 14, 2008 at 4:54 pm


Thank you for your reply and yes, that is what I did the next morning! I looked in my wallet and asked myself “I thought I pulled out 150 last night?” when only 3 $1 bills were left.

I had barely enough to pay tolls on the way to meet my brazilian co-worker, and actually had to use the debit card to pay tolls for the way home!

7 Don Paco January 14, 2008 at 5:01 pm

Coach Mike: strategic genius.

His team consists of LeBron, a decent but unreliable center and a bunch of bums.

So Coach Mike decides: I’ll have the bums play defense, and on offense I’ll just give Bron the ball.

Lo and behold: NBA finals. Coach Mike: strategic genius.

8 Jordi January 14, 2008 at 9:44 pm

I’ve been reading this website for a while now and Don Paco’s assessment was the most logical thing I’ve read yet. Brilliant!

9 caseta January 15, 2008 at 6:02 am

there’s just one problem with that “logic”. a strategic genius would have larry hughes delivering gatorade to the players on the bench, not averaging around 10 FGA per game (while making only about 2 of them)

and a strategic genius would have lebron posting up much more often cause he’s most likely the strongest SF and his athleticism, speed and explosion would allow him to score on one quick move or after taking just one dribble to the basket, before the double team could come. no SF in the league could stop him.
once he caught the ball he could:
- shoot a fade away (just like the other #23)
- spin move and dunk; shaq used to do that a lot, now dwight howard is doing it; if you’re big, strong and quick, that’s impossible to stop
- pump fake, take one dribble and dunk
- baby hook; yeah, he should work on that.

and if the double teams comes as soon as he catches the ball, unlike most of the C and PF in the league that cough the ball up as soon as they are double teamed (eddy curry, i’m talking about YOU), lebron has the passing abilities and court vision to find the open teammate.

and speaking of lebron posting up, he did it on occasion against the spurs in the finals. except for a couple of times when bowen flopped and got the call, lebron scored or assisted on a layup/dunk.


10 Jordi January 15, 2008 at 8:59 am

Not sure if I like the idea of consistently posting LeBron. It could work to get some quick points on occasion and should be in the play book, but wouldn’t it make the offense stagnant and neutralize LeBron’s “Magic-esque” abilities? Granted Magic played center once, but there never talk of leaving him there.

11 Eric January 15, 2008 at 9:12 am

Where to begin? How about starting with the fact that he spent the night,the 29th, in New Orleans losing a game. Or how how about the fact he was on his way home from the airport after flying out of New orleans. More than likely he wasn’t drunk at all. And maybe, just maybe he might have waited until the NIGHT of his birthday to celebrate instead of the morning of his birthday to celebrate. That’s what most people do. So yeah stop hatin and use some common sense.

12 The Cavalier January 15, 2008 at 10:17 am

I really stopped defending LeBron a year ago. Until he tries 100% every single game, I don’t really have much admiration anymore.*

*I did see he was coming back from the airport, so yeah he probably wasn’t drunk, just stoned.

13 The Other Ben January 15, 2008 at 10:35 am

Stoned in the airport? I thought that was only in my playbook. Well he aint got nothing on me until he facilitates a nationwide gambling ring that crosses the threashhold of morally exceptable behavior. Oh wait, hes in the NBA. Welcome to the club.

Best regards,
Mike Vick.

14 Jordi January 15, 2008 at 11:08 am

I stopped trying at my job 100% of the time. Hence this comment.

15 Greg Odens tonsils January 15, 2008 at 12:27 pm

100% of the time I watch sanford and son reruns and drink rum while crying about my failed poetry career!!!

I love you The Caviar. You have really been there for me. Now where is my silly photoshop picture and update on the goings on in your life. That would complete me like jerry macquire. Gee-OR-D or die.

With admirale colonel flip murray saunders,

Greg Odens tonsils – apostrophies + trophies = NBA Ship

16 Boney January 15, 2008 at 12:55 pm

Did someone say weed?

Rasheed Wallace, Nate Newton, Ricky Williams, Darius Miles, 1999 – 2003 Portland Trailblazers, any “gangsta” rapper

17 stopmikelupica January 15, 2008 at 3:04 pm


$11 for a shot of Patron, and you’re complaining? Don’t come to New York City. Unless you know the bartender…

By the way, “gangsta rappers” have moved on from weed smoking. Doing shots of Patron is the new hotness.

18 The Cavalier January 15, 2008 at 3:14 pm

Why would you do a shot of such expensive stuff? A shot is going right down, so why not just get the cheapest garbage you can? Booze is booze.

My tendency to binge drink may be coloring my perception here.

19 Frank January 15, 2008 at 4:53 pm

Man, booze is cheap in Cleveland but I’d expect a nice martini made out of many shots of gin if I was paying that much.
What’s the most expensive drink you’ve ever bought in NYC? DC?
Cleveland I spend $10 on a martini a couple times. Maybe $13-$14 once at a really swank place.

20 The Other Ben January 15, 2008 at 5:01 pm

Since we are on the topic of alcohol, Ive been spreading the word on this beer called Aventinus out of Kelheim, Germany. It is a Weizenbock, yes a WHEAT BOCK, brewed by the good folks as Schneider-Weisse brewery. If you are a fan of wheat beers, I guarantee you would be hard-pressed to find one better. Ive been drinking lots of different beers for awhile now (not just types, but from all countries) and this one left a dumb smile on my face. Unlike most wheats, its dark and caramel colored like a bock with a think head and spicy aroma. Its flavor has hints of clove and nutmeg with the final draw being that of bananas. Dont misinterpret that, it doesnt TASTE like bananas but you get hints of it like you would with a good wine having draws of berries, spice, earth, pepper, etc etc.

Chalk one up for me for giving a beer review on a so-called basketball blog. Time to leave the office and hit up the bar for some so-called afterwork cocktails – IE getting facedown for tonights Columbus Blue Jackets game vs the Vancouver Canucks and uh oh yeah the Cavs play Memphis.

21 The Other Ben January 15, 2008 at 5:03 pm

BTW – you all can try that delictable and mind numbingly wonderful brew at your local Winking Lizard. I believe it is beer #10 on their world tour list.

22 Boney January 15, 2008 at 5:44 pm


I was only complaining because the other dives i’ve gone to recently have charged me 11 for a beer and a shot. It could’ve been happy hour at those times, or it could’ve been that I was finally coherent enough to read my tab. Either way, $11 for a shot was a surprise to me, but not totally unexpected.

Anywho.. the “gangsta” rapper thing was just a cheap throw in.. did anyone try that new vodka “P Diddy” is trying to hustle now? he claimed in the commercial on new year’s eve that it was the official vodka of new year’s eve. It’s not grey goose…

23 roger January 15, 2008 at 6:27 pm

“I really stopped defending LeBron a year ago. Until he tries 100% every single game, I don’t really have much admiration anymore.”

That’s a pretty high standard for a guy that’s been phoning in like 80% of his posts.

24 The Cavalier January 15, 2008 at 6:37 pm

I do the best I can – blogging about basketball bores the crap out of me. I would’ve quit well over a year ago if it weren’t for the movie. You know these things.

25 Tony P. January 15, 2008 at 6:50 pm

did anyone try that new vodka “P Diddy” is trying to hustle now?


26 Greg Odens tonsils January 16, 2008 at 6:32 am

I heard that P. Diddy’s vodka is made from Jason Kaponos sweat. Any truth to that Tony P.????

Greg Odens tonsils and shit

27 roger January 16, 2008 at 7:54 am

I was just playin’.

28 Rusi January 16, 2008 at 9:29 am

Looks like the owners of the Pacers and Timberwolves hit there teams with some preemptive strikes on big contracts. I guess it’s too bad Dunleavy is tha illest.

If Chinese workers make a billion more jerseys do you think they can finally afford them?

29 jjc58 January 16, 2008 at 10:45 am

Nope. The second Chinese workers can afford anything, they’ll be too expensive for American business. We’ll transplant our manufacturing to Laos or something. (Maybe North Korea if we can ever score one for democracy…)

I remember, once upon a time, “Made in Taiwan” was code work for “Piece of Shit.” These days, the Taiwanese make microprocessors.

30 Boney January 16, 2008 at 11:06 am

I remember, once upon a time, “Made in America” meant you were buying quality. It turns out all you’re buying now is a visit to your nearest auto mechanic…

31 The Cavalier January 16, 2008 at 12:59 pm

I have nothing to write about today.

32 Greg Odens tonsils January 16, 2008 at 1:08 pm

Write about daisy’s and cinnamon and extra sleep. Look inside of your beautiful heart cavair, just look, there is magic inside, Ive seen it. Draw a silly picture of you with a cut out where your heart used to be and show that it is now filled with magic. Don’t start, everybody wants you!

Greg Odens tonsils

33 Boney January 16, 2008 at 1:10 pm

Greg Odens tonsils is right, there IS magic in your beautiful heart caviar, please, please, please draw a silly photo with you and your magic heart. I love you. I really love you.


34 Boney January 16, 2008 at 3:14 pm

now we all know that I only profess my love for The Cavalier along the email lines… and I would never call him Caviar either you silly gooses!

35 Jeremiah January 16, 2008 at 4:05 pm

I know he’s joking but…it seems as if Boney has been getting gayer and gayer over the past month or so…are you trying to tell us something?


Tim Hardaway

36 Boney January 16, 2008 at 7:19 pm

you start the question by saying you know I’m joking and then you say that I’m getting gayer and gayer and then you ask me if I’m trying to tell you something.. and then you sign it Tim Hardaway…

to bring it all together, it should’ve been a statement of how you hate me or you hate gay people and then you sign it Tim Hardaway, since he hates gays. He doesn’t ask you if you’re gay, he just hates them… so you coulda said…


Hopefully you’re joking because… if you’re gay, then I hate you.

Tim Hardaway”

37 Tony P. January 16, 2008 at 7:36 pm


Hey Cav,

It’s hump day.


War hidden agendas.

38 The Festiva January 16, 2008 at 8:08 pm

Who said what?

“I do the best I can – blogging about basketball bores the crap out of me. I would’ve quit well over a year ago if it weren’t for the movie. You know these things.”

“I do the best I can – dominating games despite such crappy teammates and coaching bores the crap out of me. I would’ve quit bball well over a year ago if it weren’t for the money and the global marketing and such. You know these things.”

“Chris Kaman is a nutty guy.”

Possible answers are:
The Cavalier
Reggie Evans
Imaginary Lebron James

“Until he tries 100% every single game, I don’t really have much admiration anymore.*”

Watch Lebron from the fourth quarter on. I hate jordan comparisons, but I really can’t remember anybody else dominating the crucial parts of games as consistently as Lebron is doing right now.

Mr. Caviar, I do believe your hippos are critical.

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