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The Cavalier

Looks like our plan worked – we didn’t watch the Cavaliers, and apparently they played with some actual energy and got the win over the Hawks last night.

(This isn’t entirely true – we flipped it on for a moment, watched Ira Newble (!) take two straight threes, assumed the worst, and went elsewhere.)

Anyway, the boycott is over, and we feel obliged to watch the game against the Rockets of Houston tonight.

By all accounts, LeBron was dominant last night, which he agrees with completely.

“When I’m in an attack mode, my team kind of vibes off that,” James said. “We came out with a focus to get a road win and we did.”

“The fourth quarter is when I need to put my cape on,” James said. “If I’m going to be a leader that’s when I’m going to have to be at my best.”

We’ve long called his attack mode “Angry LeBron”, which isn’t all that original or creative, nor by any rights do we have hold on it – any of you guys over at Page 2 are welcome to it.

Speaking of the fiasco of the last 36 hours, the following will be our final word on it in public, beyond the obligatory series of passive-aggressive jabs. With all of your help, we think our point was made sufficiently, and the last thing we want is to go from “the site who hated the tights” to “the site with the Scoop Jackson beef”.

If this isn’t fun, there’s no point to it. Alas:

1) We never, ever said we wanted Scoop Jackson fired or even disciplined. We like Scoop as a person. We just wanted “Orange Roundie” off the ESPN site. It’s now there less, so that’s something.

2) Scoop could’ve avoided all of this if he’d just contacted us himself instead of going through Deadspin. “Tell the guys over at YAY…”? Are we that hard to find?

Anyway – thanks again for all of your support. The person who overnighted the wedding cake went too far, but such is life.

NOTE: The server move is probably going to happen this weekend sometime, which is when everything gets UGLY for about three weeks design-wise. We may just operate out of two places – not sure how this is gonna go down yet.

NOTE 2: The Players Union is suing the NBA over the Roundie and technical fouls. Strangely enough, there’s no mention of this on NBA.com.

NOTE 3: None of this will stop us from getting that “League of Roundie Henchmen” stuff designed and up sometime in the future.

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Between all the Scoop Jackson stuff, Kobe putting up 52 last night, Eva Longoria gaining the ability to scream “Tony Parker is my finacee!!!”, and a few other things, we’ve barely had time to contemplate the true ramifications of our vow to boycott the Cavaliers tonight.

It’s closing in on gametime, and we’re truely not sure if we can go through with it.

The task is easy enough – we’re not at home and the Tivo hasn’t been set yet. There are also errands to run this afternoon – we could simply go about our duties and miss the whole thing.

That said, we could just as easily go home and turn it on.

Undecided – that’s the best way to describe us at the moment. As such, let’s rehash this morning’s goings-on one more time, simply for clarity’s sake:

1) We don’t hate Scoop Jackson. By all accounts, he’s a great guy and well liked. We think he made an error in judgement. We’d just like to see it corrected.

2) This has nothing to do with “getting linked by ESPN” (which we couldn’t care less about), so the people arguing that we’ve been given credit (since the YAY reference was inserted into the article) are missing the point.

3) We’re not trying to set ourself up as some defender of the right of all bloggers everywhere or something.

4) All we want is the character name pulled off that column. That’s it. The concept he can steal all he wants – although we don’t think that’s cool either, it happens every day. We own “Orange Roundie” though – we have plans for “Orange Roundie”. None of those plans involve anyone thinking it came from Scoop Jackson.

More troubling than all four of those bullet-points is this “should we or shouldn’t we” concerning the Cavs-Hawks game.

We’re 65% on “not gonna watch” right now, but we don’t want to start sending bad karma Cleveland’s way. What a strange day all around, but no stranger than two Thursdays from now, which we’ve already forseen as being “really weird”.

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(Pre-note: this post was written before the previous one, but we want this one on top for now.)

Sorry to keep you waiting.

Everyone knows what he did.

Hell, even he knows — perhaps dropping the phrase “Orange Roundie” right in the middle of it was his way of admitting it without admitting it. Who knows what goes on in the mind of someone like Scoop.

Frankly, if he’d left it out, nobody could really say anything — certainly two people on Earth could come up with the idea of the ball being sentient. By vaguely nodding to the source, he points out the whole deal, though.

He stole. He stole a concept, a schtick, a character.

He took it and presented it as his own.

It’s wrong, and people with integrity don’t do it. In any creative industry, it’s like the RULE. It’s the one thing you DON’T DO. He knows it, we know it, everyone else knows it.

(Side note here. We’ve never been huge fans of Scoop the writer — he knows his hoop, but his stuff is a little over-stylized and wordy for us, mainly due to our short attention span. Never did we think he was a bad guy, though. Never did we think he was a hack of this fashion.)

The worst part about this is that no matter how it shakes out, we end up looking bad. Just to be clear, we don’t want apologies, and we certainly don’t care about links or credit from ESPN.

What we want is a time machine, so that we can put the Roundie back in his box until it’s his time to come out. You’ll note the videos stopped — there’s a reason for that. We had a plan, and that plan is now compromised, lest the uninitiated think we draw our ideas from Scoop Jackson. All because he couldn’t come up with his own idea for a column.

Oh, and just to be clear with what this really is all about: we own the copyright on the name and character “Orange Roundie”. (We have no claim on the ball pattern, which is why we have our own being done.)

Do you hear and understand that, ESPN?

NOTE: Another point that’s really clawing at us is that Scoop completely misunderstood and bastardized the humor in “Orange Roundie” and the personality of same. You don’t throw that phrase out there without going back to the source and seeing it in context.

And you certainly don’t try to do a lame imitation of someone else’s character. This is like if someone wrote their own Spider-Man comic and gave him bird powers.

Since we’ve got stealing on the mind, allow us to steal from Seinfeld — this portion of the problem doesn’t offend us as the owner of “Orange Roundie”, it offends us as a comedy writer.

NOTE 2: It’s entirely possible Scoop innocently thought he was throwing the “cute lil’ blog person” a bone by doing this — he could pat us on the head like a small child, all like, “Here’s some candy! Do you like candy?” And we’d be all like, “Wow! Scoop Jackson reads the website! Ooooh!”

Hey Scoop — we’re a professional screenwriter, buddy. We get paid to write, too. You assume too much, especially if you think we’re “wowed” by celebrity of any kind.

NOTE 3: We welcome others to chime in as they please. Send us your links — we’re collecting them. Were not going to war with ESPN…yet. That said, we’ve had it with them — you like our style and material so much (and clearly you do), pay us to do it for you.

(For the newly arriving, click on that Orange Roundie category link up there to see the real history of the actual Orange Roundie.)

UPDATE: Scoop has responded via Deadspin:

“I actually thought I was giving them some love, even though ESPN edited out the part about them being the ball’s favorite site. Just trying to have some fun. Hope you enjoyed the piece; tell YAY I thought their overall ball coverage was brilliant. The ball, on the other hand, had a few issues.”

We appreciate the compliment, Scoop, and that’s exactly what we figured you’d say. “Aww, thanks lil’ blog guy. I’m gonna take your idea and run with it on my own in bog boy land.”

Look, we have the copyright on the “Orange Roundie”. This isn’t about “respect for blogs” or “wahh wahh recognize us”, it’s about a character that we own and commercial plans for, which you have taken and used without permission.

Again, you have every right to have the NBA ball speak in the first person (as questionable as that is to do), but you cannot call it the “Orange Roundie”.

We’re going to hold to our current opinion that this was done out of ignorance and not because you’re a bad person. We imagine we’d get along quite well with you, actually.

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Did they not understand the last post?

You have stolen an original character from us and used it for your own purposes.

There ain’t no room for fan-fiction in the Orange Roundie’s world, Scoop. You can write as the ball all you want, but you sure as hell can’t call it “Orange Roundie”. Call it “Red-Yellow Orbster” or something, okay?

Why are we fired up? You see, the Scoop Jackson column has been “fixed”. Instead of “a website” it’s “a website called yaysports.com”.

You’re making it worse, and we now have no choice but to organize. Big thanks to famed commenter “Wanna-Be Roundie Henchman”, who is now a wanna-be no more.

Welcome, friends…to The League of Roundie Henchmen.

(Official logo and merchandise to come.)

All you need to do is send Scoop an email via this link, then email us a copy of it at yaysports@gmail.com. If you’re a blogger, simply post your outrage and send us a link.

Our target: Scoop Jackson and ESPN.com.

Our mission: Exposure.

Our goal: The column pulled down off the site and some sort of retraction.

Our reasons: Theft of intellectual property with clear intent and complete disregard for the owner.

This is it, people. This is where the blogosphere rises up and says, “you’re a poo-poo head”. You can’t take our commerical ideas and hard work and pawn it off as your own. You cannot do it anymore. Like Vince Carter said back when he wasn’t disliked, IT’S OVAH.

JOIN NOW.

Jones on the NBA
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RedsArmy.com
The Rising Suns
Give Me the Rock
3ManLift
The Big Lead
NBA FanHouse
HoopsAddict
DetroitBadBoys
LowPost.net
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World Wide Reader
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Awful Announcing
Out Of Kilter
Howie the Hype
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BlazersBlog
Your New York Knicks
ESPNBS
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NBA Macedonia
End of the Bench
Sports Bastards
Wizznutzz
Bobcat Bonfire
5 Point Bucks
Whatif Sports Insider

Here’s one who’s definitely not interested in becoming an Official Henchman, and in fact thinks we’re just being racists:
D-Wil

This is much more fun than lawyers, yes? Also cheaper and likely more effective!

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These were the Atlantic Division standings as of day the last.

If you haven’t guessed, this was something we were gonna get into yesterday afternoon, but didn’t. We’ve slyly transported the picture into an all-new post, and that’s the experience you’re having now.

Alas, the Atlantic Division is worse than ever, but after last night’s Nets victory over the Celtics, New Jersey has at least taken sole control of the group.

As they say, that’s all we have to say about that, although you might go read Bill Simmons’ latest for a full breakdown of the sadness that is the Eastern Conference.

Moving on to one other NBA-specific note before we go forward with the YAY-centric notes…

After the uninspired Cavaliers lost to the Knicks at home last night, we’re doing something we haven’t done since LeBron arrived on the scene: we’re voluntarily boycotting the game against the Hawks Friday night.

We refuse to watch Malaise LeBron and his merry band of Whatever Men play down to another team they should slaughter.

LeBron – we love ya, but if you don’t care, we don’t, either. Losing is fine, and we can deal with it. What we can’t deal with is losing because you didn’t try. You guys are making us sick – it might be Mike Brown, but it’s also you, LBJ. You’re the King – act like it.

F’ING TRY – even Damon Jones, of all people, got in your face about (repeatedly) not closing out on Quentin Richardson last night.

Okay, moving on, which is a sick transition. UNGH!

We’re switching server companies, so we no longer get raped on bandwidth costs, and also so we can transfer everything over to WordPress blogging software. (From Movable Type.)

What that means is thus – our content output this month is going to be down – there’s no way around it.

This isn’t really a change from the last three months actually, but between switching over to WP, doing a complete and total redesign of the site (possibly with a different name), finishing up work on WSM?, travelling to see family in various places, some other non-blog professional things that have developed, and our vast charity works, we’re swamped.

Of course, if we’re forced to completely boycott the Cavs altogether, this frees some time up, yes?

Anyway, this starts soon – don’t be surprised if the whole deal looks different one day, and it’ll probably start on a generic design and stay there for several weeks. We don’t think we can even get to the new graphics and such until we’re home with Mom and Dad in mid-December. (Who beat us!)

Thanks for your patience – things will get back to somewhat normal in January – promise.

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We submit the accompanied picture of Clippers guard Cuttino Mobley without comment, except for the following:

Professional basketball player consistently tagged with certain rumors: CHECK

Scarf: CHECK

No shirt: CHECK

Strangely over-exposed underwear: CHECK

Possibly wearing make-up: CHECK

A bunch of you awkwardly going “Umm…yeah. Thought so.”: CHECK

(Thanks to Leave the Man Alone for the pic.)

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Elton Brand is sleepy

by The Cavalier on November 29, 2006 · 2 comments

Everything which was new but old is now old and no longer new, yet the same, once again.

For the first time!

The Clippers lost to the Kings last night, and the most unstoried franchise in Los Angeles is on a journey back to its true destiny. Step one is complete, as they’re now below .500.

How did this all come to pass? Were the Clips of last year just a fluke? Some say Elton Brand is playing on tired, Olympic Teamish legs. Others blame the lack of players named Shaun Livingston who aren’t busts. Still others will tell you center Chris Kaman is relaxing on his $50M extention.

Newly extended (4 mo’ years!) Head Coach Mike Dunleavy…weighs in.

“They’ve been tough on us,” said Dunleavy, 0-13 against the Kings as Clippers coach, before the game.

“Last year they weren’t in the playoffs and I made the comment, ‘If I could drop two teams out, one in the East and one in the West, I would drop out this team and Miami.’

“As far as anybody else was concerned, I felt pretty good about us having a chance to beat those teams. I mean, we’ll give all those teams a real good series.”

Well, there you have it – the Clips’ problems are all because the Heat and the Kings are still in the NBA.

We’d say their problem is as follows:

1) Elton Brand is tired.
2) They don’t have any players named Shaun Livingston who aren’t busts.
3) Chris Kaman loves money and girls.

Ah. It seems all the other people we mentioned above were correct, leaving us sitting here, completely irrelevant, once again.

NOTE: The LA Times has a new Clippers blog, if you’re into Clippers blogs that are associated with the LA Times.

NOTE 2: Ron Artest!

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The drama of Ben Wallace’s headwear continues tonight in Chicago, as the Bulls return home to play the Knicks.

Ben himself hasn’t spoken as of yet, and nobody knows what he’ll do/wear tonight, but yesterday GM John Paxson got his say in on the matter.

He’s obviously taking the Skiles side of things, which isn’t a huge surprise – word is there may be a fine coming.

When a coach comes out and makes an important declaration like “no headbands”, people listen.

“We have to address this now, and we’ve started that process,” Paxson said. “Our relationship is fairly new. But Ben doesn’t strike me as a guy that wants to disrupt what a team is all about. He’s been a part of too many good teams that have played together.

“We have to be a little careful in terms of changing something for one player at this time. If I knew this was going to be an issue a month or two ago and Ben had expressed that to us, that might’ve been a way to handle it. Right now, we’re in a tough position. We have the rule for the right reasons.”

“He’s still a guy that we are totally counting on. We want him to get acclimated and comfortable and playing at a high level. Obviously, we still think he can do that.”

That last few sentences implies that at some point, the Bulls might not think Ben can still do that.

But what happens then? With what’s happened, the way he’s played, and that contract, it’s gonna be hard to move him, unless maybe DET wants him back.

Speaking of the Pistons, Ben’s first trip back to the Palace isn’t until January. Should be interesting to see what happens – we expect lots of boos and even more signs about grass being greener, etc.

Of course, by then Ben could be playing in Europe or permanently suspended, or even playing in South America. Japan has a basketball league, and he could play there. Or in the National Madagascar Basketball Thing.

Wherever he ends up, he’s sure to not be getting rebounds.

NOTE: Amazing – the lack of any emphasis (from us) on the Stabury-Zeke thing, who NYC writers are calling pointless.

NOTE 2: CHI home crowd will not know how to react to anything regarding this, and thus…complete zero decibel silence.

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While the Mavs were winning their tenth straight last night, we were busy concentrating on the biggest game on the schedule.

Yep, it was the matchup of “teams who were everyone’s darkhorses to be pretty good but in actuality have the best records in their respective conferences.”

Utah v Orlando. Jazz v Magic. Dwight v Carlos. Nelson v Williams. Darko v Memet. Hill/Hill v Sloan/AK47. Mickey Mouse v Mormons.

However you want to put it, it was a large game, and the Orlando Magic came out ahead, winning on the road. Jameer Nelson is…self-assured.

“We know what type of team we are. We’re no fluke,” point guard Jameer Nelson said. “We’ve showed we have matured. Last year we might have kicked it away.”

True statement, and Jameer has really turned himself into quite the solid little point guard, just the kind that the Cavaliers could use and could’ve easily had, just like we wanted to have happen.

(This is an unverifiable but true part of our pre-blog life story.)

Anyway, interesting matchup – the Magic are on one of them West Coast road swigie deals, so we’ll see what they kick away and don’t kick away in the five games they have left on it. We’re cautiously optimistic for them.

That said, let’s go back to our first statement, wherein we said we were “concentrating” on this game.

What we actually meant is we were watching Heroes (on NBC!) and didn’t even know these teams were playing until this morning when we went to that hot new website NBA.com.

We blame our lack of NBA-centric attentions on, of course, the ongoing server issues that plague us day and night.

NOTE: Nothing!

NOTE 2: Anyone else totally, 100% sure that’s JJ Redick’s nailed-to-the-bench hand?

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After a scary few weeks wherein it looked like this entire season may be played in some kind of upside-down parallel universe, things are starting to settle down and get back to normal.

Case in point, the PHX Suns have gone 6-1 in their last seven, and are now above .500 after their win over Portland last night.

Suns are winning, Trailblazers losing. All is right with the world.

Key in the win were both Amare Stoudemire, who we’re not a fan of at all, and Raja Bell, who we’re a fan of in a way in the same fashion we’re fans of things like this Peter Cetera video.

Raja first – he put in 30 on 7-12 from three-three land. Break it down, Face.

“That’s definitely a byproduct of the way we played as a team for four quarters,” he said.

Great analysis – play as team = win. Give us something more, will you? Is this why your ESPN diaries have dried up?

As for Amare…it may surprise you that we’re not fans, since he’s allegedly one of the most dynamic young players around, despite the microfracture surgery.

Thing is, the surgery is a problem for us. There have been way too many tales of lax rehab habits and a sour atttude. These are the things that bother us – it means his comeback (20/11 last night) is a byproduct (yeah!) of luck and natural gifts rather than hard work.

Screw that – we love hard work, which is why we’re probably gonna use the impending server move as a reason to take like a week off, even though it’ll probably only take a couple hours.

See, we can make up all kinds of great stories about “server problems” and “technical difficulties”, while sitting back and wondering how everyone is falling for it. We’ll write like eight posts per day going on and on about the server problems – it’ll be a well-non-deserved break, and we can’t wait.

NOTE: Also back to normal is, of course, Raja’s Bell’s non-website, which for the 8th time has reset it’s launch timer.

NOTE 2: Darius Miles!

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