Remember at the start of Rocky V when Stallone was all in the shower like, “Hnnnggghhh!!!” and his brain damage started?
That was apparently LeBron after his epic Game V, as he had to be hooked up to an IV.
“It was just a precautionary measure, our doctors and trainers thought just so he wouldn’t cramp up on the plane,” Cavs Coach Mike [redacted] said. “Because he was pretty taxed physically after that contest. With him being as young as he is and strong as he is, mentally and physically, he should be ready to go tomorrow night.”
Um, yeah – we’d think so, too. Somehow we can’t see “LeBron James – tired” showing up on the injury report tonight.
It’s all come so quickly, really. Game 6, we mean.
We were hating the 3 or 4 days between games earlier in the Playoffs, but now that this one is imminent, we’re honestly a little freaked out, even with Chris Webber (of all people) pulling out the trademark Detroit Piston arrogant guarantee.
How will we handle it? First of all, we’re shirking massive responsibilities in order to watch this live. Fielding phone calls from family and friends is necessary to avoid heart attacks both on their end and ours.
Other concerns include panic attacks, high blood pressure seizures, broken table glass, blowing out our voice box, and instantly developing stress-induced diabetes.
Don’t misunderstand either – these are the things that will happen if the Cavaliers win.
There’s no way to prepare how to handle such a thing, because we can’t even conceive of what it’ll be like if the Cleveland Cavaliers, our Cleveland Cavaliers, go into the Finals. At home, no less.
We don’t care what infamous commenter Tony Parker says – we will cry, and we’ll be proud to cry.
Analysis and such is useless, and not what you come here for anyway. Everyone knows what they need to do.
So…go Cavs. We think they’re gonna do it.
NOTE: Brian Windhorst notes in the link above that LeBron only needs 26 more points to be the all-time leader in CLE playoff scoring. Coach Mike already has the most coaching victories. Say all you want about Boston or LA’s storied histories, but…um. Yeah. Look, Mark Price was awesome, okay?
ANOTHER NOTE: Anyone else think the Magic giving Billy Donovan a massive six year deal to coach is a disaster in the making? Don’t they read the history books re: college coaches in the NBA? Maybe ORL should’ve kept the pan as GM.
LAST NOTE (until the next one): We had no idea the Indians were playing the Detroit Tigers in Cleveland tonight, as well. The city may very well explode.
We’re about to go on Paul Teeple’s show on SportsTalkCleveland DOT COM, and we’re at a bit of a loss as to what to say. This is much the same situation we find ourself in with this post.
What can one write about what LeBron James did last night?
If you’re from Cleveland, you know what that meant and how it felt and what it was. Actually, if you’re from Cleveland, you probably don’t know what that meant or what it was. You know how it felt, but the feeling of overwhelm likely just meant no sleep.
(If you’re not from Cleveland, you just saw one man inject some actual intrigue into the Playoffs. Everyone outside the Detroit area wins here.)
Honestly, we feel silly trying to put any of this into words, and to be overdramatic, doing so disrespects what happened and what we all, yes…what we all witnessed.
So we wont. Read any of the 84,000 articles and blog posts we’re going through right now.
LeBron James ripped out the hearts of the Detroit Pistons last night and the Cleveland Cavaliers are one game from the NBA Finals.
We’re shopping for plane tix, because if they go, there’s no way we’re not there for it. No freaking way.
…yeah.
Morning soon. More then.
You either saw that or you didn’t.
In case you’ve forgotten, tonight is the pivotal Game 5 in the CLE-DET series. Pivotal being defined as:
piv·ot·al –adjective
1. of, pertaining to, or serving as a pivot.
2. of vital or critical importance: a pivotal event.
3. not having to do with Kobe Bryant
[Origin: 1835–45; pivot + -al]
Many a prediction are flying around, and most take into account that the Cavaliers actually beat the Pistons in Games 3/4, and weren’t simply the beneficiary of some Detroit malaise.
We can’t find where at the moment, but even Chauncey Billups managed a respectful compliment.
Keys for Lebron’s team? Keep playing the defense you’ve been playing all series, while deploying the LeBron James of Games 3 and 4, as opposed to the guy who showed up in 1 and 2.
What should the Pistons be going for strategically? Perhaps if they can somehow get their backcourt and frontcourt to show up on the same night, it could help. Of course, since Chris Webber died or something, it may not be easy. For his part, Coach Flip claims Webber not only isn’t dead, but could contribute.
“He’s still important to us and hopefully he’s not going to get into foul trouble and be able to do some things,” Saunders said. “But sometimes when he’s gotten in foul trouble, it’s given other guys opportunities to get in there and do well. So you go with those guys.”
Hmm…sounds to us like the entire Pistons organization is ready to cut Chris and also give up. Haha on them. Go Cavs!
There were many, many incredible moments for Cleveland fans during last night’s victory over the Ex-Lasers, and we’ve pinpointed our favorite fairly easily.
No, not Boobie’s 12-12 freethrow performance or various drives. No, it wasn’t Sheed’s self-implosion or Chauncey’s various late-game screw-ups. It wasn’t LeBron’s inspiring fast-break oop from Gibson, either.
Nope…it was Rip Hamilton trying to psyche out LeBron at the free-throw line and LeBron literally shoving him away. If that doesn’t sum up this entire series, we don’t know what does.
We’ve now read 860 separate articles on this game, and that action isn’t mentioned nearly enough. (Nod to FreeDarko for being astute.) That’s the LeBron James we’ve been waiting for all year.
As for our favorite post-game quotes/actions, outside of the Sheed jersey-throw, we’ll go with this bit of genius from the ever-wise Piston Chauncey Billups.
“They pretty much know what they’re up against, and they know if they don’t bring their A-game they don’t have much of a chance. But they’re doing that, they’re bringing their A-game,” Billups said. “Our A-game and their A-game [are] really different, and hopefully ours is coming real soon.”
Oh, okay.
Keep it up, Chaunce. If you haven’t noticed, you’ve been unable to bring your personal “A-game” against the Cavaliers for about 2 years now. Their defense may have something to do with it.
Or maybe not. Perhaps you just scrambled the assist and turnover columns in your brain whenever you hear anything that rhymes with “Bleveland”.
Sheed sucks – Cavs in 6. And yeah, we mean that – this could so easily be 3-1 or even 4-0 right now, especially when you take the third quarter blahs into account. LeBron woke up in Game 3, and anyone who can’t see the difference between LBJ in the last two games and LBJ in the first two is probably named Chauncey Billups.
NOTE: Windhorst says DET is rumored to have some chemistry problems in the locker room at the moment. Surely Game 4 was a salve for such problems?
UPDATE: Boney has officially boycotted the Pistons!
Quick – scramble for an excuse, Pistons fans.
It was Chaunc…no, he had 23.
Ooh! Tay was off…wait. He had 15.
Rip! No…19.
What about Rasheed – he managed to mentally take himself out in the 4th, but do they really want to lay all blame there?
Hmmm…it seems the Cleveland Cavaliers simply beat the one-time Lasers again to tie up the Eastern Conference Finals at 2-2. Not only that, but if it weren’t for the traditional 3rd quarter collapse by CLE, this thing wouldn’t have been close.
Quick quote from DetroitBadBoys’ pregame post:
With Larry Hughes out, rookie Daniel Gibson should be Cleveland’s starting point guard tonight. “Bold†prediction of the night: forget what you’ve seen from Gibson in spot duty so far this series, Chauncey Billups can and will exploit the rookie to make everyone forget about his first three games.
Common misconception among the media and non-CLE fans about Hughes there.
Believe us, nobody who’s a Cavs fan was sorry to see the man on limited duty. In fact, he single-handedly launched us (to the tune of 0-3) into our aforementioned 3rd quarter malaise.
We’ll have more in the morning, but wanted to get something up.
PS – Daniel Gibson is having his Tayshaun Prince moment. And we love that cocky grin he wears – he actually looks like he’s having fun.
First of all thanks to all of you for being so respectful of our wishes not to be spoiled on the game, considering we were watching it late.
Unfortunately, we didn’t cover all of our bases, and were spoiled anyway.
Alas, the important thing is they won, and that LeBron James played like he’s supposed to, ie with 100% effort. Driving with aggression, lots of steely gazes, etc, etc. (And pregame shooting work? Oy!)
In fact, we’d go so far as to say his steely gazes last night were strangely real, as opposed to many of his past ones, which always seemed to be a bit of a show. LBJ had a gameface on from the tip, no doubt about it.
“In order for us to win, I have to play like this,” James said. “And that’s not holding the ball as much and not allowing their defense to set. They’re very good when you allow their defense to set. I was a little more aggressive on the post. Once I got easy baskets, that opened up my outside shot.”
That’s it, and we love it. No drama, no hyperbole, no “it’s okay to lose”. Just facts – facts we’ve been asking to see for what seems like forever.
Other facts that worked in the Cavaliers favor last night:
* Larry Hughes got hurt, forcing Coach Mike to play Daniel Gibson extended minutes. These were, as they usually are, successful minutes.
* Eric Snow spent a lot of time on the bench, practicing for his coaching career.
* Chauncey Billups continued to struggle, and as one of the TNT guys said, three times is a trend. He’s not having off games – the CLE defense is doing something to him. Something that won’t stop, because Chauncey Billups sucks.
* The crowd waved towels around. In circles.
* Finally, after writing a semi-creepy ode to LeBron, ESPN’s Ric Bucher made up stories about Kobe Bryant demanding a Jerry West inspired trade, which was quickly denied in the LA Times.
That last one had nothing to do with the game, but was worthy of mention. All-in-all, a fine night of Cavaliers basketball. We expect Tuesday’s Game 4 to be equally as victorious, only moreso. We smell a blowout, and all because Chauncey Billups sucks.
Couple notes for today’s CLE-DET Game 3 – we’re shooting pick-ups on the movie late this afternoon, so we’re not going to be able to watch the game until like 9 Pacific Time.
If you can do us a favor and not send us any emails regarding the outcome until at least 3am Eastern, we’d appreciate it. We’re going to have to be in our email periodically, and obviously don’t want to get spoiled.
Thanks for that – you’re all good people.
So…we’re assuming the Cavaliers will take the next two in Cleveland and make this a three game series. Simple as that – if these games go how they have been, the homecourt scales should tip in their favor.* This is also the perfect time for the Lasers to get a little complacent. (Sheed is about two more flops from punching Varajao and getting himself ejected, also.)
As usual, all is on LeBron for tonight. In the Akron Beacon Journal, Terry Pluto writes a convincing defense for the lad to all the various criticisms he’s received lately, and this statement stands out above all others.
Think about yourself at 22 and being in the public spotlight like James, where every word is considered and commented upon. How would you do?
We took this question and sat back on it for a bit, before realizing we have no answer. We don’t remember what we were like at 22, as our maturity levels varied wildly from 16 through present day.
16 is always the baseline, and if you’re using a line graph, we fluctuate up and down over the years between the maturity levels of a 16-year old and even up to a wise old man in our really good years.
THAT SAID, at 22, not only would we not have been in the Eastern Conference Finals, we probably were using our bedroom window to go to the bathroom. (As opposed to going to the actual bathroom.)
In addition, we were neither 6′8″ nor black at age 22. (That was a phase we went through at 24, if memory serves.) We did wear a headband quite a bit, however, which is a testament to how far ahead we were on basketball fashion trends.
To sum up, at 22 we were under the influence of [redacted!], none of which could be described as fruits and vegetables. We were also white, 6′3″, and futuristically fashionable.
Cavs in 7.
* Boy, that homecourt advantage would look good right now, huh? Perhaps a little more effort in those Knicks, Celtics, and Bobcats games next season?
Jack Cobra is up Friday as usual, and we don’t have much to say anyway after Cleveland’s Game 2 loss to the Pistons. We hate doing bulletpoints, but it’s all we can manage right now.
* Great first half. Movement on offense, and LeBron was on GO as soon as he got the ball. It worked and stuff – weird.
* CLE, due to Coach Mike’s infamous “dead, frowning puppies” halftime speech, continues to be the absolute worst 3rd quarter team in the history of sports, and the entire 2nd half it was back to “give LeBron the ball 35 feet from the hoop and have LeBron stand there for 3-5 seconds, allowing the DET defense to get set”.
(We realize this isn’t what Coach Mike is likely telling them to do, but they do it. Who do we blame when they do it repeatedly? Over and over and over, all season long? If any of you can figure out where we’re supposed to lay blame, we will.)
* Now, a lot of Cleveland fans are already pinning this on the refs, particularly with the last play, when LeBron drove, and may or may not have been fouled. Our position is as follows:
* They scored 26 points in the 2nd half.
In addition (more bulletpoints):
* On the last play (down 1 with 24 second left), Coach Mike calls a timeout, allegedly to set up a game-winning shot play. (For a moment, disregard that they should’ve gone for a quick score and relied on their defense, among other things.*) What was that play?
Give LeBron the ball 35 feet from the hoop and have LeBron stand there for 3-5 seconds, allowing the DET defense to get set.
Seriously? You called a timeout for that? That’s your whole play? The thing that sank your entire team in the second half? The BS, POS non-offense that allowed the Pistons to come back from 12 down?
That’s your whole play??? That’s it????
Fire him tonight – seriously. It’s beyond ridiculous at this point. He’s LeBron’s Doug Collins – we can only hope Danny Ferry can find his Phil Jackson this summer.
* And why wasn’t Z in there for a potential offensive tip? He’s the best at that – it’s like where half his boards come from.
UPDATE: It’s hard to even get mad at the Lasers. They’ve gotta be sitting back and being all, “How the hell are we winning these games? Doesn’t it seem like we shoulda lost?”
Unfortunately, we don’t have much time this morning, but allow us to say the following about the CLE loss to DET last night:
Not bad.
They showed up and competed, but if there’s one complaint…yeah, it has to do with LeBron. (We’re not talking about the last play – that was executed as drawn up, although we would’ve liked to have LBJ go in and tie it up.)
LeBron’s problem is LeBron, but is also tied intricately into Coach Mike* – they’ve got to get him to the basket. He had zero free throw attempts last night – none. Zip.
You can see why – the Lasers were all up on him as soon as he got the ball. This in and of itself is not the problem – that’s expected. The problem is he’s getting the ball in the customary “30-35 feet from the basket” area Coach Mike likes him to get it in.
Post him up. Post him up. PLEASE.
And we’re not talking about the thing where he posts up wide on the wing, then big-pivots around so he’s…back at the 3-point line again.
Put him down on the deep freaking block and get it into him, then surround him with a cutting AV and your shooters – Gibson, Jones, and/or maybe the occasional Marshall.
We just can’t understand how this doesn’t get run constantly, although part of this is on LBJ, as well. He’s gotta GO as soon as he gets that thing – no more standing around for 3-4 seconds, allowing the defense to adjust. Why do the Lasers that kind of favor?
We’ve all seen him barrel through 3 and even 4 bodies once he’s rolling, and Webber, et al aren’t quick enough to get into a charge situation. Just GO to the hole. You’re unstoppable, but not if you sit there and stare at the basket before trying to get to it.
All in all, the team was aggressive and played tight defense. It was nice that they Retarded Chameleoned the correct direction, and we expect this thing goes seven if everyone keeps their heads on straight. It’ll be an ugly seven, but seven nonetheless.
*Coach Mike also must’ve given his customary “all the puppies are dead” halftime speech.
